Oh, Elizabeth

 

For those who know me, I've been a long, hard admirer of movies and music.  I love it all for the most part, but I do have my favorites.

 

Of course, a sappy love story is a staple amongst my repertoire and LMN usually has some pretty good ones, at least when you don't get re-runs.  I've seen all the re-runs.

 

Music is in my soul, given to me by my Daddy who was a huge Elvis Presley fan.  He sang to anything and everything and even sang to me while in the womb.  He sang me one particular song that I rarely play because I can visually see and hear his sweet voice leaning over my mother's stomach and singing that song to me.  It's from the Statler Brothers, titled "Oh, Elisabeth".

 

By reading my blog you will know that Elizabeth was the name my birthparents were going to name me, so the song was very appropriate as well as poignant.  The lyrics go:

 

Oh Elizabeth, I want to see your pretty face
I want to touch your lips,

I want to feel your warm embrace

 Don't know if I could ever live my life without you
Oh Elizabeth, I'm sure missing you

 

I remember when we shared a life together
You gave me strength and love with life that felt brand new

 When you're so far away, I'd have to say I'm feeling blue
Oh Elizabeth, I'm sure missing you

 

Well it's been said before that I've caused many heartaches
And I wonder if that was really true
Being all alone feels my heart would surely break
Oh Elizabeth, I hope you understand

 

Don't know if I could ever live my life without you
Oh Elizabeth, I'm sure missing you
Oh Elizabeth

 

This is our song, my mother, fathers and mine.  It makes me cry every time I hear it or play it, so you can venture to say I don't play it much.  Usually when I'm missing my Daddy.

 

The part of the song, where it says "Don't know if I could ever live my life without you..." proved to be true, as my father committed suicide in 1974, I was 10. 

 

I never met him, but once I found my birth mom and heard their story and heard this song that he sang to me over and over again, I felt, feel, a love that's indescribable.  We share 9 months of a lifetime, a trip to Disneyland (my first, even if I was in the womb), a love that will never die and a Father that protected me at all costs. 

 

I wish I could have known him.  My heart breaks for the sorrow in my heart, but when I see his picture I'm renewed with the Cartwright strength and know he is all around me, always watching over me and constantly protecting me.  I couldn't ask for a better guardian angel.

 

To my Daddy, I promise to always do what's right. I promise to love unconditionally, I promise to love my children even when death takes me, because there are no boundaries for love.  I promise to embrace my music, sharpen it, tune it and practice, practice and practice.

 

I promise, to always and forever be a faithful member of the Cartwright Clan, one so that he will be proud of me.  I know he wants me to search out his ancestors and that there are relatives he has re-united with in heaven just waiting for me to do their work.  I promise to make more of an effort to do those things.

 

Lastly, I promise to remain true to myself.  To not let others drum my drum.  To always stay to my true east and face it fulltime with faith, anticipation and hope.

 

I am a daughter of God, but better yet...I am a daughter of Gerald Emmett Cartwright. Born Christmas Eve and died July 24, 1974.  He will always be remembered, loved and cherished and most importantly never forgotten.

 

Oh, Elisabeth....she longs to see your pretty face.....

 

I am Debbie and I was here...